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Whether you call them hoops to jump through, hurdles to move over, or just steps along the way, it can be hard to wait and watch and wonder. Of course, I'm speaking of "the process." That opportunity to first hear God's call to ordained ministry, to voice the obedient 'Yes,' and then walk and wait between steps along the way for God's people to concur.

I have been a Candidate for Holy Orders in The Episcopal Church for only a short while, but on this journey far longer. After the call, there was a period as an Aspirant, then later as a Postulant. Relationships change. You are lifted up by a community, but then told you now belong to the Bishop. What follows is a long period of some being and a lot of doing. There are those three years of seminary, including chaplaincies, internships, and field education opportunities. Hopefully towards the end of that time, the Committee on Priesthood recommends you, the Standing Committee approves you, and ultimately Bishop affirms and accepts you. 

This past week, I received a kind invitation from my presenting priest to serve as Deacon at the altar of my home parish the day after my planned ordination to the Transitional Diaconate. I wanted to respond right way, "Why, Certainly!"  But not wanting to put the cart before the horse, as I have tried to do through this entire process, I waited. Knowing the Standing Committee's final approval was needed first, I waited. When the kind invitation was repeated, I called my presenting priest, also a member of the Standing Committee, to inquire and accept. Yes, I have been approved for ordination to the Transitional Diaconate on June 2, 2012. 

Now as I sit here and contemplate how my life, and our life, both mine and Heart Of My Heart, is changing, I move from Wondering to Wonderful, with a hint of Whoa! added in. Periods of Transition are good and necessary. I hear my Mother saying, "Honey, don't wish your life away." I will treasure this emerging reality for the accomplishment that it is, the opportunity that it will become, and for the work to which God has called me. I am so excited. I am incredibly humbled. And I am somewhat terrified. But the still, quiet voice comes now to say, "Do not be afraid. I go before you always. Come, follow me, and I will give you rest." AMEN.